Thursday, 3 January 2013

2012 Part One

It’s been a funny old year has 2012, full of ups and downs, discovery, loss and the usual bullshit!

The historic abuse enquiry in Jersey came to a close; however, in my opinion it seems this may have been premature especially in the light of the Jimmy Savile exposure. Of course those in power will deny there is any need, heads in sand again.

In regards to the whole Savile saga, SOJP and the states of Jersey, we knew, we told you, you didn’t believe us and then you decided to do what you do best, absolutely nothing. Shame on you all.

After much huffing and puffing and one failed delivery I finally received my care records from Jersey, were they complete? Not on your life, I may not be ‘educated’ but even I can spot gaping holes and believe me there are lots. Funnily enough, they were in 2 parts, part one was from birth to 9 years old and as far as I can tell is complete. Part two is all about my time in HDLG and surprise there is so much missing I wouldn’t know where to start!

I learnt a lot from part one, probably the biggest revelation was discovering who my father was; unfortunately this info came too late as he passed away some years ago. I also realised that I had been completely let down by the states from a very young age not just from the time I entered HDLG, even now, just thinking about it makes me so angry.

On a happier note, I also discovered copies of hand written letters from my mother; they are very moving and indeed moved me to tears. I’ll be honest I have made assumptions over the years and felt bitterness and anger and unloved even saying that she abandoned me twice, I just wish I had seen the letters because they explained so much and most importantly showed me just how much she loved me and how difficult it was for her. My biggest regret is that I didn’t know these things and never got a chance to say sorry for the way I behaved and to tell her I finally understand and most importantly that in my own way I loved her.

Kevin, Linda, Carol and Wayne, I know I hurt you, I have no excuse and all I can do is tell you that I am so sorry. File-Sharing News And Information