Wednesday, 24 September 2008



You broke me by Brokensoul


You broke my heart,
You broke my soul.
You broke the reason,
Of me living,
On this world.

You made me cry,
You made me scream.
You are the reason,
Of the pain,
And me screaming,
All night long.

You destroyed my dreams,
You killed my spirit.
I will never forgive you,
For letting me fall,
Deeper and deeper.
I would never forget,
The reason that I cry,
And want to forget,
That life will continue,
Until I close my eyes,
And sleep forever. 

Sunday, 21 September 2008

Jersey abuse enquiry

I dont really want to say much about this. I was a resident at Haut De La Garenne between 1970-76. I buried alot of things and emotions deep in the recesses of my mind a long time ago, however, I now find myself having to deal with them all over again and believe me when I say it is very, very painful.

Thursday, 11 September 2008

what a year its been! (Part 2)


So, having had my heart 'fixed' by the surgeons and being well into my recovery my poor heart gets well and truly broken!!! Let me explain.....
15 years ago I married my true love, not just my true love but my soul mate. I'm not going to kid myself or you and say it was the easiest marriage but 13 years on we were still together. I suppose it was inevitable that we would seperate, it really was one of those 'cant live with her, cant live without her' relationships. Anyway, I really believed (somewhat foolishly it now seems) that we would get it together and make another go of it. Then my world fell apart when she announced that she had found somone new (on the internet!) and that she wanted a divorce so she could marry him. Had I been stronger both physically and mentally maybe I would have fought harder but as it is I just gave up and gave her what she wanted, no fighting or any of that nonsense. I guess I thought it would be easy to just 'walk away', how wrong was I!
I still love her and I guess I always will but time moves on and as time goes by it becomes a little easier to bare.

Wednesday, 10 September 2008

what a year its been!

Well 18 months actually!
Feb 2007 saw me in hospital in Wolverhampton having a triple heart by-pass after I had a second heart attack in 5 years. I had to wait for 6 months between being told I needed it and actually having it and I can tell you in that 6 months I went through every emotion known to man. The fear of dying on the operating table gave me nightmares and really scared me.
Thankfully, all went well and I'd like to say a big thankyou to the surgical team and all the staff at the heart and lung unit in wolves who looked after me so well.

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